Common misconceptions, explained
These are general examples of misunderstandings, not statements attributed to North Cestrian or its staff. Open a statement to see the correction and a practical question.
“We have to wait for a diagnosis before helping.”
The facts: Support should be based on the child’s needs. A missing diagnosis should not by itself delay or prevent SEN support.
What help can start now, while we wait for the assessment?
“No EHCP means no extra support.”
The facts: SEN support can be provided without an EHCP. A plan may be needed where a child needs support beyond what is available through SEN support.
Please explain the support being provided now and how you will review it.
“The same rule must always apply in exactly the same way.”
The facts: Schools can set behaviour rules. For disabled pupils, reasonable adjustments to rules or sanctions may be needed. What is reasonable depends on the child and the circumstances.
Which adjustments were considered for my child, and why was this approach chosen?
“SEND means a child can never receive a sanction.”
The facts: A child with SEND can receive a sanction. School must consider relevant needs and disability duties. Neither the sanction nor a SEND label alone proves the decision was lawful or unlawful.
How were my child’s needs, support and any disability-related factors considered?
“A SAR gives a parent every school document, without anything removed.”
The facts: A SAR concerns personal information. The right belongs to the child, and parental access is not unrestricted. Some information can lawfully be removed or withheld.
Please explain any missing information or redactions and the reason for them.
“A complaint or records request stops an appeal deadline.”
The facts: Do not assume a deadline is paused while you wait. EHCP appeals and discrimination claims have their own rules and time limits.
I need advice about the deadline now, while the school complaint or records request continues.
Everyday examples: what to record and ask
What might this look like in everyday school life?
All examples below are fictional. They are not accounts of North Cestrian, any member of staff or any child. They show questions to investigate, not findings about a real situation.
Repeated trouble starting written work
The situation: A child talks over others or leaves their seat when a writing task begins. The parent has three behaviour messages, but does not yet know what support was used.
Keep a note of: Write down the dates, tasks and recorded behaviour. Include the child’s account, any known learning needs and what staff say happened. Do not assume a reading difficulty or anxiety caused the behaviour.
A practical next step: Ask whether the task was accessible, how instructions were explained and whether the pattern suggests a support review. Discuss a small change, such as breaking the task into steps, and agree when to check its effect.
Please help me understand what my child was being asked to do, what support was used and whether we can try a different approach.
Support is written down, but delivery is unclear
The situation: A support plan says a child will receive a regular check-in. The child says it did not happen on two days. School has not yet confirmed either way.
Keep a note of: Copy the exact wording and record the dates and source of the child’s account. Mark the check-ins as “not confirmed”, rather than stating they were definitely missed.
A practical next step: Ask who provided the check-ins, when they happened and how delivery is recorded. If Section F of an EHCP specifies support that is not being provided, tell the maintaining council as well as the school.
Please confirm how this support was delivered on these dates and what will happen if a session is missed.
Attendance is becoming harder
The situation: A child regularly reports feeling sick before one school day. Attendance is falling, but the reason has not been established.
Keep a note of: Record attendance dates, the child’s words, reported symptoms, relevant school events and what helped. Keep observations separate from explanations. Seek appropriate health advice for symptoms.
A practical next step: Ask school to discuss possible barriers with you and your child and agree a support plan with a review date. Do not assume every absence has the same cause.
Can we look at what is making attendance difficult and agree the support, who will provide it and when we will review it?
Asked to collect a child “to cool off”
The situation: After an incident, school asks a parent to collect a child for the afternoon because of their behaviour, without explaining whether this is a suspension.
Keep a note of: Note who called, the time, the exact reason given, time out of school and any letter received. Record how school says the absence will be marked.
A practical next step: Ask school to confirm the basis for sending the child home and provide the written decision and relevant rights. Sending a child home for disciplinary reasons without the formal suspension process is not lawful, even if a parent agrees. Seek prompt advice; other reasons for leaving school, such as illness, need different consideration.
Please confirm whether this is a formal suspension, the reason and duration, and how I can make representations.
Guidance behind these examples
SEND support and review ↗Attendance support ↗
Behaviour, adjustments and informal suspensions ↗
EHCP support duty ↗
Choose an evidence sheet →